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I met a couple who clearly gave me a beautiful life lesson.
Yohann, undergoing a MtF gender transition, came to learn how to do makeup accompanied by his partner Paloma.
An incredible open mind, a grand love, Paloma supports her partner in this journey and they intend to live through this stage in Yohann’s life hand in hand.
Here is his story.
I’m 29 years old, was born male, I’m in a relationship and father of a little girl, owner of 2 dogs with my partner, and we have a beautiful loft.
I run a brand I created in sports, and we live near Orléans in Loiret (45).
I think it has always been inside me, but I believe I had to mask what I felt to appear “manly.”
During adolescence, I already noticed something wasn’t “common,” or at least I didn’t react like other boys.
For example, my posture, the way I behaved, my emotions…
Then I devoted a lot of time to my sports career, which somewhat anesthetized me from all these thoughts for a while.
But I noticed that I didn’t have a male body shape: I had a hollow back like a pregnant woman, fat on my buttocks… It might seem silly, but when I talked about it with close friends who knew me as an athlete, some reminded me that back then, they teased me saying I had “girls’ buttocks.”
Also, my best friend often says to me, “It’s crazy how you react like a woman the way you do.”
After my career, these feelings started coming back without me really understanding why.
Financial independence allowed me to explore this little by little, about 3–4 years ago.
I believe this desire has always been permanent.
I remember myself as a child, attracted by everything related to gender change with a strong inner wish to change.
Then it became occasional, then semi-permanent.
Today, I see that I think about it all the time, so I plan to undergo surgery.
Femininity is a bit like the missing piece, the one that brings out color, joy, creativity, and much more within me.
I’m learning to love myself.
When I’m a woman, it truly fills me with joy and gives me incredible energy.
My partner and I went for a week to Iceland in October.
I was fully dressed as a woman without having to worry about people’s prejudices, who might sometimes stare or misgender me.
At the restaurant, we were called “ladies.”
I clearly felt that I loved it: makeup, dressing up, walking around, crossing my legs…
So many gestures that were previously forbidden to me because they were judged too feminine.
In short, you have to live with the right gender and be in harmony with your personality.
Although I don’t like the word “cross-dress” because for me, it has never been about folklore or entertainment, I started fully feminizing myself (makeup, outfit, shoes, wig) in September 2019.
Partially (outfit and shoes only) since 2016.
It really was my one-week trip to Iceland that was a revelation for me.
My family and close ones know and have all accepted it well; I haven’t received any discouraging words or anything else.
However, I judged it necessary to do it when I was ready.
The steps in Iceland and surgery helped me envision a future with a feminine appearance.
I was therefore able to bring up the subject with the right words and receive no denial from them.
My deepest fear comes from our French society, which is about 20 years behind the most open countries.
For example, we saw a show where a couple was helped with their business in England.
It turns out the husband was cross-dressing. The presenter approached the subject with great kindness and sincerity.
Unfortunately, I remain convinced that in France, the same report would have hidden this fact or made fun of it.
Yet, I believe that anyone has the right to do what they want with their life as long as they do not harm others. No one should judge or dictate what is right or wrong to do. If your family doesn’t accept it, ask yourself why they don’t accept it?
Often, it’s purely selfishness.
I’m lucky to have talked about it with my partner quite early so that it became part of our relationship and not a secret that weighed on me.
I don’t think it’s good to keep such a secret to yourself.
One day, a friend told me, “to choose is to give up.”
I understand that people live based on others, but between living YOUR life or living a life by choosing not to upset anyone is never good. And in my opinion, it just delays the problem because sooner or later, things get out.
I started last November right after our return from Iceland with rhinoplasty and septoplasty (ENT part to straighten the septum).
Then cheekbone reshaping with my own fat because I had an acne scar that made a hole.
I am currently undergoing several chemical peels to smooth my skin.
I began permanent hair removal on my beard and chest.
I will have a hyaluronic acid trial to fill my temples, forehead bumps, and especially to lift my eyebrows.
If I like the result, I will do it permanently along with breast implants.
I do not consider hormones as long as we haven’t started a family with my partner Paloma.
I have also started feminizing my voice with a speech therapist.
I do not plan physical sex reassignment but administrative reassignment in the medium term.
In purely feminine terms, I look forward to getting my first haircut, manicure, fully enjoying women’s restrooms, going out in the city to eat or have a drink, shopping.
In short, living…
Paloma and I had many discussions about the beginning of my transition and set steps.
We joyfully and with complicity made our first purchases.
For the major part of facial feminization, we needed to call on a professional. A simple internet search led us to Jennifer, who welcomed and advised us well. Today, the makeup is more discreet because over time you find your style.
But the base and the technique are the methods Jennifer taught me (us).
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